I recently had the opportunity to spend time in an elementary school and  experienced the pleasure of making daily observations with children 3-11 years of age. One of my favorite parts of the day was watching the children walk in each morning all bundled up for the cold, entering to start their days, holding hands. 

 

While some children were hand holding, others were arm in arm, and there were many gleeful greetings and sharing of special occasions from the night before or for the day that was beginning. I often saw congratulatory hugs, fist pumps or high fives. The kids were connecting with each other and with the adults who teach them.

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The need for human touch is one of our most basic, primal needs.

Touch deprivation is correlated with negative health outcomes such as anxiety, depression, and immune system disorders.​

-Psychology Today, The Vital Importance of Human Touch by Nicole K. McNichols, August 3, 2021

 

Leave it to the kids to know what they need and know what they are doing; they tend not to be emotionally guarded nor have built-up walls. They are also not digitally connected in school, thanks to New York State Governor Hochul’s recent statewide ban.

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A famous experiment using monkeys (Harlow & Harlow, 1965) is the most profound example of research regarding the primary need for touch. Harlow created surrogate mothers for baby monkeys, one set made with wire and one set made from a soft and cuddly cloth. Each infant learned to recognize their particular assigned “mother” and became attached to its unique face. In a series of experiments, the wire mothers eventually were the only mothers that held a bottle with food. Harlow found that the monkeys spent more time next to and snuggled against the cloth “mother” than they spent with the wire mother even though the wire mother was the only one with food. Concluding that  “food may be necessary for survival, but touch is what sustains us”.